If a tree falls in the forest...

Pop quiz...



You have ordered clothes. They are due to be collected on Monday. On what day should you go to collect the clothes?

• Monday


• Wednesday


• Friday fortnight

Ans: Monday. The clothes will not be ready on Monday but your appearance will remind the tailor that they are due. Going on Wednesday means that your existence shall be forgotten for a further 2 days. While waiting I have plenty of time to ponder on life's great mysteries. For instance, if a tree falls in the forest and no one is there to hear it, does it make a sound? You see here in Nigeria no tree worth its salt will fall unless there is someone watching and badgering it to tip over. Why bother otherwise?

And Friday fortnight is still likely to feature in the whole clothes collection scenario.